Daylight Bends
by terriblegrace
Summary: When she opens her eyes, Jake's looking at her like she's the only girl in the world. And all she can think is: FML.
1. Chapter 1

The whole "having control" thing was feeling pretty good. Well, that and the fact that her mom told her on the drive home that she'd smeared a cupcake all over an expensive-looking (ugly) vase in the Saxtons' foyer before bolting to the car. She only wished she could be there to see the looks on Darlene and Sadie's faces when they discovered it. No, scratch that. She was pretty used to seeing that trademark disgusted look on Sadie's face. And Darlene's face would probably just crack into pieces. Seriously, that woman couldn't pump any more chemicals into her face and _not _expect it to burst one day.

But back to the point. No more sex with Matty until he realized that she wasn't just going to be some skank anymore. She was done trying to DTR their relationship; it was his turn to do that. (She just really hoped that he _would _DTR their relationship—in a good way—because if he didn't, then it meant he really only ever saw her as a skank in the first place, which would mean that everything with Matty was over, even the sex, which she really liked even though it had started making her feel increasingly guilty. Damn Ming.)

When her phone rings later that night and she sees the name "Jake" pop up on the screen, she starts thinking that maybe asking him to call her had been a really, _really _bad idea. Because suddenly she kind of wishes that it was Matty calling her instead and she knows it's totally not fair to Jake.

But she answers anyway, because no matter how strong her feelings are for Matty (because, let's face it, he was her _first _so she's probably always going to feel _something_ for him), whenever she thinks about her kiss with Jake, she gets this fluttering in her stomach that she can't explain.

"Hello?"

"Jenna? It's Jake."

She sits on her bed, stares down at her shoes, "Hey."

"Hey."

"So…you wanted to talk?"

He laughs nervously, "Yeah. I guess I just wanted to talk to you about, you know…"

"About the kiss?"

"Yeah. Maybe I could come pick you up or something. I kind of don't want to do this over the phone."

"Sure."

"Cool. I'll be there in, like, fifteen minutes?"

"I'll be outside."

They hang up, and she notices that she has a text message and it's from Matty. _I need 2 c u tonight. _And it kind of makes her heart melt, but she just shakes her head with a newfound determination to scrape together some kind of self-respect and deletes it.

She sits down on the steps outside her house and waits for Jake. She hears his car coming up the street before she sees it, and then he pulls into her driveway. She slips into the passenger's seat and he gives her that cute, shy smile, which makes her blush.

"So…" she says, as he's backing out of her driveway, "Where are we going?"

"I broke up with Lissa," he blurts out, looking over at her quickly to gauge her reaction.

_Wow_. Because it's really all she can think.

"When?"

"This afternoon," he says, "I just…I don't know, Jenna. I can't stop thinking about you."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I mean, I guess we just click or something," he says, "You're different than Lissa. Than any of the girls at school, really. And I keep thinking about when I kissed you and how I wasn't really sure how you felt about it."

He pulls the car over into an empty parking lot and kills the engine, turns to look at her with this frustrated look on his face.

"I just…I mean…how _are_ you feeling about all this?"

If she was being honest with him, she'd say she was feeling really confused because for some reason, what he's saying to her is making her heart beat faster in her chest and her palms all gross and sweaty. But she's also been thinking about maybe how this whole "having control" thing with Matty was a big mistake and maybe she should just be like every other slut-bag teenage girl out there and just let him have at her.

But instead she says, "I've been thinking about it, too."

"What should we do about it?"

She hates herself for what she's about to say, because she knows that part of her just wants to make Matty jealous. But she can't help feeling that maybe part of her wants this thing with Jake, whatever it is.

"I think we should give it a shot," she says, "That is, if you're okay with dating an ex-Knick-Knacker."

He laughs, "Oh, I'm totally okay with it."

He drives her back to her house, and they wind up sitting in her driveway for a long time talking about whatever. And she can't help but think that she's never been able to talk to Matty about whatever. It was always like, _Wham Bam Thank You Mam_, and then he was gone.

"Oh, man, you should have been there when Sadie's mom flipped out," Jake tells her when the conversation somehow gets back to the Knick-Knackers.

"What happened?"

"Someone shoved a cupcake in this vase-thing they have. It was almost as good as one of Sadie's meltdowns."

"I hope they caught the bastard," she says, "I mean, can you imagine what kind of heartless cretin would do something like that?"

Jake eyes her with a grin, "Really? It was you?"

She rolls her eyes, "Puh-lease. Like I would do something that childish. My mom, on the other hand…"

"You know, I was kind of wondering why you were even there in the first place. The Knick-Knackers didn't really seem like your thing."

"Yeah, but it was totally my mom's thing," she says, "Until this afternoon, when she realized _like mother, like daughter_."

Jake laughs, and then it gets quiet and she can hear them both breathing in the night air. She notices that he's grabbed the steering while and is gripping it tightly.

"Can I kiss you?" he finally breathes out, like the words had been suffocating him.

She swears she sees him blush, even though it's pretty dark out.

"Yeah."

And then his hands fall off the steering wheel and find their way into her hair, and he's pulling her into him until her lips find his. Somehow her hand finds its way to the collar of his shirt and she's gripping it tightly as his tongue slides gently past her lips, and she feels the heat flushing to her face.

Somewhere in the middle of their kiss, Matty's face pops into her mind and she has to pull away. When she opens her eyes, Jake's looking at her like she's the only girl in the world. And all she can think is, _FML_.

* * *

><p>"Shut up!" Tamara yells into the phone so loudly that she has to pull her own phone away from her ear to keep from losing her hearing.<p>

"Does that make me a slut?"

"Okay, first of all, I told you to shut up because I am _not _believing that you're dating Jake Rosati now and that he kissed you and you didn't tell me about it," Tamara says, "I'm seriously beginning to question if I even know you at all."

"Come on, my life has just been a little crazy lately. Besides, I always wind up telling you anyway. It's not like I'm hiding anything."

Tamara huffs on the other end, "_That I know of_."

"Okay, fine, I'm sorry. Is that better?"

"First thing's first. This totally _does _make you a slut. You can't fool around with Matty and date his best friend."

"But I'm not fooling around with Matty anymore."

"Uh-huh. Like I'm going to believe that. You'll wind up back-flat behind the dumpster again before you know it."

"How can you say that? You're supposed to be giving me moral support."

"Jenna, look, I totally get that you want to make Matty jealous. And, believe me, it's probably going to complete mind-fuck him that you're dating Jake. I just…well, you _are _kind of bad about saying no to Matty."

She plays with the fringe on her pillow and refuses to respond, which means she knows that Tamara's right.

She hangs up with Tamara and sits down in front of her computer, staring at the empty writing space, the blinking cursor just taunting her to type something in.

_Playing the Field – I'm not sure when the game changed from me lusting after Matty to me (sort of) getting (sex) with Matty to his best friend kissing me to me having control to me dating said best friend. _

_But it did. _

_And the worst part about it all is that I thought I was in control, like I knew the playbook like the back of my hand. And now the rules have changed and I'm just standing in the middle of the field while everyone else runs around me. When did my life become such a cluster fuck? Seriously? And when was anyone going to tell me about it?_

* * *

><p>It's only lunchtime the next day, and word of his break-up with Lissa has already spread like wildfire because he's been getting dirty looks from every pep squad girl he sees all morning. Sadie Saxton shot him a stare that could literally have been a death stare, because, seriously, that girl creeps him out sometimes and he's not entirely sure what she's capable of.<p>

And he feels really bad about it (the break-up); he _does_, because he knows that Lissa isn't a bad person. It's just that he doesn't feel anything with her. Never really did. With Jenna, it's like he feels everything.

He hadn't seen Matty all morning but spots him in the lunch room while he's waiting in line to get whatever craptastic "special" they're serving today. Even though Matty had been acting kind of strange about the whole Jenna thing when they were working the Knick-Knackers event at Sadie's house, the guy was his best friend and he had to talk to someone about it.

"So, I saw Jenna last night," Jake says.

Jake notices that whatever Matty just took a bite out of almost propels out of his mouth and so he asks wryly, "Is that bad?"

"Uh, dude…I mean, you just broke it off with Lissa, right?" Matty asks, "And I didn't know you were _that _into Jenna."

"Yeah, well, maybe I kind of am," he says, picking up his fork and stabbing at whatever it is that's on his plate.

"It's just weird. I mean, you only kissed her, like, once," Matty says, then eyes him suspiciously, "It _was _only once, right?"

"You've been acting really strange lately," he says, "What's up with you?"

Matty laughs a little too quickly, a little too loudly, "Me? Acting strange? You're the one going around kissing Jenna Hamilton."

Jake drops his fork and looks up at Matty, "And what's wrong with Jenna Hamilton?"

"Because," he says, "She's a suicidal freak."

Which is the moment that everyone in the cafeteria decides to go quiet. Jake notices that Matty's eyes flicker from his to somewhere behind him. And he sees Jenna standing there, with her bag over her shoulder and her bangs almost falling over her eyes. And she looks like she's about to cry. She turns on her heels and disappears from the cafeteria.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Jake asks angrily, grabbing his back pack off the floor and following Jenna outside.

"Jenna! Wait!" he calls out, but she doesn't even stop or look back.

She's walking crazy fast towards the girls' bathroom, but he manages to catch up to her just before she pushes the door open. He gently grabs her arm, making her stop and look at him.

"Matty's being a dick right now," he says, "Seriously, I don't know what's up with the guy but ever since I told him about us, you know, kissing the other day-"

"You told him about that?"

Jake lets go of her arm and rubs the back of his neck self-consciously, "Yeah. I mean, I didn't go around telling _everyone_. Matty's my best friend."

"I'm sorry I freaked out and left."

Jake wraps his arms around her, pulls her close for a hug, "Don't be."

She closes her eyes, knowing how bad it is that she wishes it was Matty who'd ran after her instead.

* * *

><p>"I can't believe he called you a suicidal freak!" Tamara exclaims at the end of the day.<p>

Tamara's waiting for her mom to pick her up, and Jenna's waiting for Jake, who's offered to start driving her home after school now.

"I mean, he _knows_ you didn't really try to off yourself," Tamara says, then gasps, "Oh my God, he's walking toward us right now."

Jenna starts turning around, but Tamara grabs her roughly by the shoulders and looks her square in the eyes, "_You _are in control, okay?"

Jenna nods, and then they hear a car horn and it's Tamara's mother sitting by the curb motioning for Tamara to hurry up.

Tamara turns back to Jenna, "Female solidarity, girl power and live long and prosper and all that shit, okay? You totes better text me later and let me know what happens."

She nods again and then Tamara's gone and it's Matty who's standing in front of her.

"Look, Jenna-"

"I believe it's _suicidal freak _now, right?"

She hates how bitter and angry she sounds.

"I didn't mean that, okay? But you're into Jake now, I mean, what's up with that?"

She takes a deep breath, tries not to get lost in his eyes or let him notice that she's breathing heavier.

"Who I'm _into _is none of your business now," she says, "You weren't ready to be in a relationship with anyone yet, remember?"

"Yeah, and you said you were cool with it," he says, frustrated, "I thought what we had going on was working."

"Yeah, well, it was for a while. And then I got tired of it, okay? If you don't want me dating anyone else, you should have thought about that before. You should probably run along now. You wouldn't want to be seen talking to a _suicidal freak_."

Seriously, whoever wrote that letter and told her to stop being a pussy would be so proud of her right now.

He sighs, frustrated, "The only reason I called you that is because I wanted Jake to think you really were a suicidal freak so he'd leave you alone and I could have you back."

Which is pretty much the moment when her heart stops beating. Temporarily.

"Hey, what's going on?"

They both turn around and see Jake walking towards them. Jenna notices then how close Matty is standing to her, and she steps back.

"Nothing," she says, "Matty was just apologizing for what he said earlier."

Jake looks to Matty for confirmation, and Matty just nods his head. Jake grabs her hand, and she notices how Matty's jaw tenses ever so slightly. But she doesn't look back as Jake leads her to his car and opens the door for her and then gives her a reassuring smile as he cranks the engine and they leave.


	2. Chapter 2

"So, about two nanoseconds after you went public with Jake, our boy McKibben decided to go public with Amber Blunt," Tamara tells Jenna the next day after first period.

"Wait, you mean Amber 'The Cunt' Blunt?" Jenna asks.

And it wasn't that Amber necessarily _acted _like one so much as that she _used_ hers. Quite often. And with multiple guys. And girls. Or, so Jenna had heard. Even if she'd heard that Matty decided to date Sadie Saxton, it still would have been better than hearing it was Amber Blunt. (Okay, maybe not.)

Tamara vigorously nods her head.

"And what exactly do you mean when you say _go public_?" Jenna asks, clutching the strap of her bag just a little tighter because she wants to know the answer but she's pretty sure she's not prepared for it.

Her friend, who knows her all too well, eyes her wearily, "Are you sure you want to know?"

"Give it to me."

"You're not going to go all Sylvia Plath for realsies this time, are you?"

Jenna rolls her eyes, "Come on, Tam. I would never kill myself, much less over some guy. Besides, Sylvia Plath stuck her head in an oven. I supposedly tried to kill myself multiple other ways."

Tamara takes a big, dramatic breath in, "I saw them playing tag, but, you know, _with their tongues_."

She can't help it. Her heart starts doing this weird thing, like hurting or something, and she finds it seriously hard to breathe. It was like when she saw Matty kissing what's-her-name in the hot tub.

And then it's like the whole world starts constricting around her. So, even when the second period warning bell rings, she decides that ducking into the girls' bathroom is probably a better option than actually going to class and having the teacher ask her if she's okay and having to lie and say, "It's just allergies."

She, of course, tells Tamara that she's fine before doing so and then sulks into the bathroom by herself, finds an empty stall and then plops down on the floor next to a stinky toilet. (She thinks, _screw whoever wrote that letter. I'm a pussy for right now, okay?_)

Sure, Matty had told her he wasn't ready to be in a relationship. And sure, she'd gotten pissed and then this whole thing with Jake happened. So, it wasn't like she should be upset that he was with someone else, too. But, really, it was _Amber Blunt_, so there was only one reason he was with her. (Okay, well there could be multiple reasons, 'cause it was no secret that Amber was supposedly really good at a lot of different things.) But _still_.

And the writing on the bathroom wall confirmed it all.

_AB loves BJs. _

_Amber Blunt = Big Cunt. _

And then there's just a drawing of a girl with tiny little penises and hearts floating all around her with the words _This is Amber Blunt_ over it.

Jenna groans and buries her face in her hands.

"It's you!" someone exclaims from above, and Jenna raises her head and sees Ms. Marks peering over the wall from the neighboring stall.

She could have sworn this meant that she had to be one of the most unfortunate people in the world, but she wipes her eyes (discreetly) and smiles anyway, "Ms. Marks! What are you doing in here? Shouldn't you be, um, counseling or something?"

Valerie looks at her a moment, and then her face falls, "It just gets so hard sometimes, Jenna, you know? Being a counselor and having all of these kids look up to you and adore you and demand _so much _of you."

Jenna raises an eyebrow, "I can imagine."

Valerie sighs and then disappears behind the wall again. Suddenly, there's a knock on Jenna's stall door and she sees Valerie's platform sandals on the other side.

"Who is it?"

"It's me!"

"Who?"

"Valerie!"

"Valerie who?"

"Oh, just open the door, Jenna!"

Jenna reaches up and unlatches the door and it swings open. Valerie squeezes inside and latches the door shut again, plopping down on the toilet seat. Jenna thinks the day just went from bizarre-o to way bizarre-o.

"Do you know how hard it is to remember every kid's name that comes to see you?" Valerie asks, "And then one of 'em gets upset when you call her Sara but her name is really Tara…or…was it Kara? Whatever. The point is, Jenna, that there's only so much room under this ol' Mama Bird's wing."

Valerie lifts her arm and flaps it a little bit for emphasis.

Jenna grabs her bag and starts standing up, but Valerie gently pushes on her shoulder to make her sit back down.

"We're not done here. You are skipping second period and that's a _major _offense, missy. I'm going to have to give you detention again and call your parents and possibly write about it on my Facebook page…"

And all Jenna can think is that her life might officially be over because she never used to get into trouble at all, and now she's going to get detention _again_. And Matty is face-groping Amber Blunt. And she's really, really confused about whatever it is she's feeling for Jake.

Valerie eyes her for a brief moment before breaking into laughter, "J/K, Jenna! God, I totally had you going there."

Jenna gives a small smile as her heart rate returns to normal. Valerie slaps her on the shoulder, "But, seriously. Feeling a little blue today?"

Jenna shakes her head, "Oh, no. Just, um, having some _lady _troubles, if you know what I mean."

Valerie gasps, "Did you just give birth in here, Jenna?"

"What? No. That doesn't make any sense-"

Valerie gasps again, "Was it a miscarriage?"

Jenna shakes her head, "No, God no. I just…I _meant_ I started my period."

Her counselor snaps her fingers, "That was going to be my next guess."

"Yeah, so I wasn't feeling so hot, but I'm actually feeling better now after our talk so I think I'm going to go to second period now."

But Valerie puts her hand on Jenna's shoulder again before she can stand up, "No need in going to class late. Might as well wait until third. Don't worry, I'll write you a pass."

Jenna smiles tightly, "Great."

"Anyway, so, like I was saying…" Valerie continues.

Jenna's pretty sure that the day just went from way bizarre-o to completely whack.

* * *

><p>By the last class of the day (statistics, <em>ugh<em>), everyone in the school is talking about Matty McKibben hanging all over Amber Blunt. She can't go anywhere on campus without hearing someone talk about it.

Ming is in class with her (which Jenna is thankful for because even though it might be a stereotype, Ming is _really _good at math), and they're working on some problem about white and green marbles in a bag or something when someone taps her on the shoulder. She turns around and Sadie and Lissa are standing there.

"So, you've somehow managed to get Jake to agree to go out with you, huh?" Sadie says, putting a hand on her hip, "Did you have to threaten to kill yourself first?"

Jenna narrows her eyes at Sadie.

"Well, we know he isn't with you because you put out or anything," Sadie continues, "What guy would want to bone a stick figure anyway?"

Jenna bites her lip so hard it almost bleeds, because Matty McKibben _has _boned her stick figure. Several times, in fact. But it's not like she would go around blabbing that or anything. She doesn't know why she lets Sadie Saxton get to her.

"How does it feel to be a boyfriend stealer?" Sadie asks.

"I didn't steal anyone's boyfriend," Jenna replies, "It's a free country, and Jake can date any girl he wants."

Jenna sneaks a glance at Lissa, who looks like she's about to cry. She thinks, _God, my life went from absolute boredom to drama-paloozza. _

Ming speaks up, "Why don't you go back to copying your answers off of Paula Kim and leave us alone?"

"Why don't you go back to whatever third world country you snuck into America from?" Sadie retorts.

Ming looks at Jenna, "Seriously? She's serious?"

Sadie and Lissa turn on their heels and walk to the back of the class. But before they sit down, Sadie snatches the worksheet off of Paula Kim's desk.

* * *

><p>After class, Jenna is waiting outside by herself. (Tamara has "something she has to take care of regarding Ricky Schwartz," and Ming's got to catch the bus.) It's been the longest two days of her life and she's just ready for the entire week to be over. A pep squad girl walks by, gives her a sour face, and flips her hair.<p>

In the process of rolling her eyes, Jenna catches sight of Matty…who has his arm slung casually around Amber Blunt's shoulder. Amber's twirling a piece of her long, blonde hair with her finger and laughing about something Matty just said. Her skirt is insanely inappropriate even for the MTV Movie Awards, much less high school.

She jumps when she feels someone slip his hand in hers and turns to see Jake standing there beside her now, beaming down at her.

"Hey," he says.

"Hey," she says, glancing over at Matty, who's looking at _her _now.

She glances away, looks back at Jake, who's started talking, "So, Mr. Mirohea fell asleep in class-"

She cuts him off, pressing her lips to his and wrapping her arms around his neck. She feels his arms go around her waist. Then basically she has her tongue down his throat, and she realizes she's never been this public with her displays of affection. (Okay, so riding Matty behind the dumpster was technically _in public _but it was different because no one was watching—she hopes.)

She pulls away, and Jake has this dazed expression on his face. Then, he starts blushing profusely, and Jenna thinks it might be the cutest thing ever.

"You ready to go?" he asks.

She nods. He grabs her hand again, and they walk to his car. He even opens the passenger's side door for her and casually rests his arm on the back of her seat as they drive away.

Later that night, Jenna's lying in bed, getting ready to go to sleep when she suddenly realizes that she'd forgotten to even see if Matty had reacted to her kiss with Jake. She kind of thinks that may be a good thing.


End file.
